Q&A: Creating Content to Advocate and Bring Joy, Tefi Talks Reviving Celebrity Culture, Finding the Meaning to Life & More
THE INTERNET'S BIG SISTER — Estefanía Vanegas Pessosa, better known as Tefi, is a social media sensation with a heart of gold. For years on media platforms, Tefi has become an individual that others look towards for affirmations and advice. Her honesty and authenticity, which she swears by, has given her the opportunity to touch many people’s lives through the power of the internet. Her love for celebrity culture, her knowledge on y2k, and her relatable humor are what many people love to watch her talk about on her platforms.
Starting out on YouTube and having the opportunity to star in her own show, Tefi explains how due to the pandemic she shifted to creating content on TikTok, where her followers grew in abundance. However, it's not the gain of followers that strives Tefi to create content — it is instead being able to spread awareness on issues she greatly stands behind. Unlike most influences, Tefi advocates on her platforms from topics that include mental health awareness, spreading self love as well as self awareness, and graver issues such as climate change.
Apart from using her platform to advocate and support issues impacting our society, she is a lover, and she champions on softness. It is difficult to look on the brightside most days, but Tefi doesn't tell you to “go make yourself a tea” or journal but to accept the emotions taking over and be aware that they will pass. Although she appears to know all the answers in the world to achieve self love and realization, Tefi is honest about the fact that she is still figuring things out herself — it's her genuineness and ability to always show her viewers the raw truth that makes her so special in this day and age. Tefi paints a new light on celebrity culture that she feels during her teen years was ruined by the media, who would drag stars away. She wishes to do things differently and do them right by demonstrating that love comes first — not slander and hate.
Read below to see what Tefi has to say about her dream Coachella lineup, her beginnings, and how to find success during this digital era. . Stay tuned to see any new and upcoming endeavors Tefi will be up to this year, and of course keep up with her on TikTok where she continues to deliver honest content.
Photo By Frances Hamrock
LUNA: Thank you for your time. We're very excited to have you!
TEFI: Thank you!
LUNA: So to start off, how are you? What have you been up to?
TEFI: How am I?
LUNA: Yes.
TEFI: I mean… (laughs) I think there is a delicate dance between mental health and social media. And I preach about it a lot. But I think, sometimes, when we're in an amazing place, it's so easy to be like, “Girl just eat!” Like when your friend is going through a breakup and you're looking at them and you're like, “Oh, my God, but that guy fucking sucks” or, “You can do this!” And then you have to go through it and you're like, “How could I give them that advice? Like, this is the hardest thing in the world.” I think mental health is kind of like that.
So, when you're going through a bad time, you're like, “I can't believe I told these people to journal” (laughs). I think, right now — I decided yesterday — I was going to reevaluate my dance with social media in a way where… and not in a way where maybe I'm distancing myself, but in a way where I can maybe show up as my best self. I think anything less would be unfair … to the people who I'm to give advice to because I feel like sometimes it's too easy to say, “Go for a walk,” “Clean your room,” you know, but I think if I were to stand back and be like, “Okay, so how can I actually connect with people without just like spewing the same things over and over and over?” So, I think that's where I am right now. Obviously, I haven't slept (laughs), but I think I'm gonna take two weeks to be like, “Okay, we're in a cocoon right now. Where the hell is the butterfly?” You know?
LUNA: Nice.
TEFI: Gorgeous new metaphor no one's ever heard before (laughs).
LUNA: Leading up to what you were just talking about with social media, talk to us about Coachella — how was that experience?
TEFI: I am 31 years old (laughs) — my bones are tired. But, I think, one: I'm not a big festival girl in general. First and foremost, just walking to different stages, I'm like, “Guys, my seat.” But I got to meet so many people that I've been talking to for so long online. I saw some people that I haven't seen and haven't met ever, like different content creators, and we cried. So that I think was really… for my Cancer heart, it was especially dramatic and emotional and, like, made me feel alive.
But I also got to meet people who have been following me for a while. And it's funny because I really do feel like I know them so I think that was really fun. Crowds, though, I do have some social anxiety stuff that I need to work through, and crowds do make me really, really freaking nervous and I haven't even been through anything traumatic that you haven't been through, like, 2020, being inside. And I think [of] talking to my camera, and the only people that I talked to the most are Jade, who's on this line, my manager Gabby, my assistant and project manager and love of my life, Shannon: those are the people that I talk to the absolute most, and I've met so many social media content creators who are like, “Oh, these are the only people that I hang out with.” And I'm like, “I can't do that.” I need to remember how to be in the real world. And I think Coachella did that for me in some weird way where I was like, “Oh, I don't think I think I can.” If I only know how to be around the people who know me so well that I don't have to talk to them all the time, I don't think I'm doing this right. Like, if I'm making content to connect people and I'm letting everybody else connect with me, I don't think I'm doing this right.
LUNA: Alright, so a little fun question: If you could do a Coachella lineup with all your favorite artists who are dead or alive, whichever decade, who would be on it?
TEFI: Oh my god. This is such a good question! Okay, first and foremost, Britney Spears, obviously — I would love to do Britney Spears from the Britney album … the I'm a Slave 4 U album. You know what I mean? … Or In the Zone. That would be a really good album. But I feel like the Onyx tour, where she's going on tour with Kevin Federline — brunette Britney — but I also feel like “I'm a Slave 4 U” Brittany was … when people who were her fans were … watching this person become an icon. Seeing those dances again and seeing those outfits and hearing those lyrics — it would be insane! I'm getting goosebumps. I'm so pathetic (laughs).
I think I would do ’90s or late ’80s Madonna. She is entertainment. Then I would do Janet Jackson, but Janet Jackson would be the headliner. And then after Janet Jackson I think I would want to see my Latinas. So I would want to see Shakira. My mom is Colombian so I've been listening to her since she was on cassette, since I was a little girl. Next, I have to say JLo — I would lose my Latina card if I didn't, like the album after the “Waiting for Tonight” JLo. Then I think I would want to close it out with Stevie Nicks, like Fleetwood Stevie Nicks, and I would have Natalie Imbruglia come out for one song and one song only: “Torn.” Then maybe Harry Styles could come up — maybe I would let him MC the whole night … I’d love like a real hardcore Ladies Night, but he gets a pass. And then as the show is shutting down, like, “Aww, it's over,” the lights would come back up, huge fireworks from a helicopter; there’s a parachute coming down [with] Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter. Imagine! I can't believe I'm throwing up.
LUNA: Okay, so a little personal question: Your beginnings — when did this all start in your heart? Was this always the path you had in mind for yourself?
TEFI: I mean, I always tell everyone [that] I always knew that I wanted to be seen. I felt like I wasn't what people wanted to see. I think back to y2k [when] we were kind of obsessed with being like mean blonde, white and rich, like the Regina George, Paris Hilton … those were prototypes that were being spit out all the time. Even Rachel McAdams in The Hot Chick. You know, you were either the main girl or you were Ali from The Notebook, and I was neither. I was just a kid trying to memorize Lil’ Kim lyrics all the time.
As a kid … I think teachers thought I was dumb. So, they kind of gave up on me. Somewhere along the way I was okay with being a supporting character to people’s lives. I think, when I moved to New York … I was dealing with a lot of food and body image stuff. So when I was 22, I went to a rehab facility, and my mom sent me to one in Colombia. I love the kumbaya stuff. People talk about rehab like it's so bad. I'm like, “Babe, I was fingerpainting. I would go back today.” And as a Cancer, you're telling me I could talk about my feelings? I'm fucking in. And my perspective kind of changed.
When it came to fear, I felt like it was just fear of taking up space. So, I came to New York, I started working all these odd jobs — like you name it, I did it. I was doing personal training, assisting at galleries; I was doing personal shopping, I was working on boutiques, I was doing fashion PR… I was doing all of it. And sometimes all at the same time. I was very, very lost. And then I started working for this production company, and that was the first time I was around really confidently creative people. I don't know about you, but feedback… I’d rather take an aluminum bat to my knees. This [was] the first time I was seeing creative people who were saying things to clients and brands like, “You hired me for my expertise and if you don't want that expertise, and you just want me to do whatever, then I rather my name not be attached to this work, I'll work on this set, I'll do the hair, makeup, whatever it is, I'll direct it, produce it, I'll be the photographer. But this is not aligned with my work.” I started to apply that to the things that I wanted to do and, at the time, it was social media. Luckily, I had a friend who was working in production at another studio, and she DMed me and was like, “Hey, one of my producer friends, she used to work at VICE, now she's at this startup. She's looking for [a] TV host and she asked me if I knew anybody, and you can't seem to shut the fuck up right now.”
So, I showed up to the audition; like 100–200 other people were there. They put me in front of a light and a timer and said, “Talk for 15 minutes,” and I did it. I spoke for 15 minutes. And I was the only person from that group that got hired to have this show. That really helped my self esteem. I got to hire whoever I wanted, I had an unlimited budget because our investors were very, very generous. I got thousands of organic subscribers, which is exactly just like word-of-mouth. And then COVID came and our investors pulled out, so I couldn't even afford to be on set anymore. So I was like, “I have all this material and people already kind of follow me on TikTok” — I had like 10,000 followers and I was like, “Let me just take this to TikTok.” And that's really how it started.
And for some reason people cannot believe that I was alive during 2004 like, “OMG you saw Mean Girls in theaters?” like, girl, I saw film in color, I did not see Abraham Lincoln be assassinated (laughs). But there was like this y2k revival and I was like, “Okay, pull up a chair, put some more logs in the fire, and I'm going to tell you the story.”
LUNA: That’s really nice — it's really inspiring! Did you ever think this would happen? It's very well deserved, by the way, how everything came along, like you said, organically and authentically. How do you manage to have success during the digital age?
TEFI: I'm going through something really, really hard in my life where I'm trying to mend all these cycles and traumas but there are so many things about our life that we cemented as teenagers. For example, one of my friends … She's 32, and [a] guy in middle school told her that she's too clingy and calls him too much. To this day, to call a guy that she likes is horrible. And I understand there are things, like, when I was 15 that I absorbed and I walk around with them, but I feel like I'm in this process right now in my life where I was in LA for a long time, and I feel like when you're traveling you can push a lot of things aside but now that I'm in Brooklyn for these past few days I really sat down and [have] been like, “What are the things that you really need to work through?”
And I think about the pain of social media. I already mentioned the dance, but you have to know more about intent versus impact … There are certain subjects that we need to talk about, and they're super sensitive. I mean, 2020 was proof enough, but I hate that the internet has gotten to a place where, like, to disagree with me, you're my opponent. Obviously there are some things that you cannot disagree with, like, I have to be like, “Look at me, Sharon, the earth is not flat — I'm sorry. Like, I can't meet you halfway.” But there are things in life where I feel like people need to hear — like when were 15–16 [or] whatever — or like my friend, [hear] how would her life had been different if maybe we had somebody in our life that had said [something different.] I've always felt that I was clinging, but really I was just so affectionate and excited … would that have been different for her? And I want to be that person. But sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I'm not brave. And I want to be brave. But I have to tell myself, there is a difference between courage and self preservation, and I don't want to burn out because I love what I do. But to be misunderstood is heartbreaking. Does that make sense?
Photo By Frances Hamrock
LUNA: Yeah, that makes perfect sense.
TEFI: I feel like it's just a responsibility. It becomes a responsibility before you know it. So, you start off being very opinionated but then you start to realize slowly — like [it] creeps in that what you say really, really weighs on people … and you have the power… You'll never change someone's mind. But you could maybe help a perspective … you'll never ever, ever change somebody to [think] that the earth is round, you know what I mean? If they think it's flat, but to present something [different]... We all know that feeling of being told that you're an idiot all the time, you know what I mean? We can relate to doing those things, or whatever. But I think boundaries are so important.
I've been preaching about boundaries for years now, and I feel like I'm always constantly working on mine. I feel like people only want you as long as you're like a mirror to them, and if you don't reflect their exact narrative you'll be chewed up. I'm trying to figure out ways we can talk about pop culture or we can talk about mental health, where we can talk about maybe trauma in ways where we're sharing, and I'm not debating with you.
LUNA: Yes! Love that. Since we’re going off about this topic, you're what is considered an “influencer.” I put that in quotations because I feel that, from watching you, you're a bigger entity than that because you are aware that you have a platform, and you do advocate for several things. How important is it to you to spread awareness on mental health, self esteem, and recently even climate change, which is a huge topic that not a lot of influencers will go up and talk about — thank you for that by the way!
TEFI: Of course. I think there are topics where we all feel it but nobody wants to say anything. I picture it like that meme of the dog in the room that's on fire, and it's like, “This is fine.” So, I tried to do a lot of retrospection and hindsight… I tried to share my hindsight, so hopefully people can be like, “I wonder how I look back on that for myself.” I saw this video the other day where this woman said, “You gotta put your fist down — you're not angry, you're scared.” That's hard to admit fear. But you're scared, right? Like, you're scared. You're scared of being misunderstood. So, why do you want to live with that stress?
And when it comes to climate change, I think, sometimes in our lives, there are things that are so easily done that we do not do right. So, we avoid answering the email for 10 days and then we do it and it takes 10 minutes — those moments literally fucking kill me. Like, doing the dishes, doing your laundry and stuff. And I feel like we were treating climate change like that. I'll get to it, I'll get to it. So I ran to my app. I was like, to address the scary elephant in the room, you know. And with climate change, I think the issue is, as a society, people don't care about underprivileged communities and indigenous communities — we don't care because they feel so far away. The first people that feel the effects of climate change are impoverished people. And it's so hard because I grew up in the US in a time where anybody could be anything. And I'm watching these people ask for help. This person is an important person, he exists and nobody's listening because he's in Flint, Michigan. It's really, really hard.
I think that social media and climate change do have a correlation. And I think it's because we're so obsessed with our opinions and our faces and our voices that sometimes we don't bother to listen to other people's voices and we don't bother to look at their faces, and we don't bother to ask questions. So, I think climate change has become political because we let it, but that's what I try to tell people all the time. People were like, “How could you believe the hoax of climate change?” Would you rather be wrong? Like, would it kill you? Would it kill you to text your frickin’ senator? Like, would it kill you? If all of us were to just educate ourselves for a minute I think we could change the world.
I don't want to scare people into being better. I'm not someone who's paranoid. I'm not trying to discipline you. I try to think about things in future tense without getting too carried away from the present, but I’d really want my kids or my friends' kids or my nieces and nephews — children — to be proud of me. And I think as long as I'm always aligned with that on social media and in the real world, I think I'm doing a good job.
LUNA: Yes, Tefi for president!
TEFI: Let’s do it! No, I would fuck you guys over so bad. I would. I would love to be more involved with humanitarian stuff, I just need to figure out a way where I can take criticism of it.
LUNA: Yes. You started interviewing stars during movie premieres, which was awesome. I'm Latina myself, and it's really inspiring to see sprinkles of representation in Hollywood. How does it feel to go from covering the premieres on your TikTok with opinions on what they're wearing to actually be there interviewing a bunch of A-listers and seeing them for yourself?
TEFI: I'm very happy. I'm very happy that my life has turned out this way. But it is weird to look certain people in the face and be like, “Oh my god, you're just a little boy. You're just a little boy.” I'm turning 32 this year, and obviously a lot of starlets are younger than me. Like, I look at Zendaya and I'm like, “You have the confidence of a person that's been doing this for 50 years.” She looks you in the eye and she talks to you. And you know, it's crazy. I've been in rooms with her where she shakes everyone's hand … she has a presence and I'm so proud of her.
What’s weird, though, is that you do become protective of these people, like with Timothee Chalamet. When I interviewed him for Dune, he really thinks about what he wants to say. And I was thinking about it. I'm like, “It's because he wants to be taken seriously.” He's really, really pensive about the things that he wants to do. And I sometimes want to look at him and be like, “Relax your shoulders, you’re fine. You're so talented. You're a kid.” But I feel like I can still humanize people and admire them. And I don't want to use the word “cancel” anymore. I don't want to use the word “criticize”; I want to say “accountable.” And I've said this many times — accountable has been used a bunch lately, but I think accountability is a love language because it means that I know that you can do better than this. So, I want to start applying that. But the veil about celebrities is no longer exciting unless it's scandalous. I would like to be a part of a revival of celebrity culture, but if we get a second chance to do it I want to do it right this time. Because, in the beginning of the interview, I told you [that] being 15 and seeing people be perfect all the time really fucked with me. I feel like there is a way that we can make people human without driving them away. I know that we love people first. I know that, as people, we want to like people first. The only times you don't like people first is when we're scared that they won't like us. So we beat them to the punch. And I just wish there was something I'll figure out.
LUNA: Over at Luna, we are all about pictures taken on film. On your Instagram, we've seen that you do have some film flicks. Which one is your favorite that you or someone else has taken of you that you felt caught the moment of that day or an emotion in particular?
TEFI: I'm sitting on the curb [in the photo]. That one … is the true essence of me. I am always feeling like that because I like thinking about something. I spend the majority of my day thinking about how I can empower the people around me. And sometimes, like in that photo, I'm like, “ I just need to sit.” I can't.
But I was sitting and I was like, “I'm so tired,” but I look at it and I can remember that day, and I had a really hard day. That was a day where I [had] really bad body dysmorphia. That day [at] work was really overwhelming. I didn't know how I was going to fit everything in. But then I see that photo and I'm like, “What a cutie patootie” — if none of that really matters… I wish I could tell her what I would tell what I told you. I would tell Timothee like, “You're good. You’re chill. You're good. You're fine. Relax.”
LUNA: Okay, last but not least question: Any big sister advice you'd like to share with us?
TEFI: My big sister advice is I think [about] the relationships in our lives: platonically, romantically, and professionally. The point of them is to feel good, and they're never going to be perfect. You know what I mean? I was once talking to this shaman and I was asking them, “What's the point of my life? Like, do you need to look at my natal chart? Do we need to pull out cards? Do I need to get the coffee to grind the tea leaves? Like, you name it.” And they were like, “No, everyone has the same purpose.” And I was like, “What do you mean?”And he goes — whenever I tell people this, they like to fall apart at the seams — “The purpose of life is to enjoy ourselves.” And it's so simple, but it's so detrimental to some people. Because I feel like we have made our identities to be the mother, the martyr, therapist, the dependable friend, the support system or whatever. And the moment you [ask] them, “Are you enjoying yourself?” everything changes. So, I wish I could just look at people sometimes like, “It's okay that it's not perfect.” And everybody has issues they need to work through. The purpose of wanting to work it out is because you're supposed to enjoy this with everything. My grandma always says there's no award for suffering when we die.
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